The Dirty Diaper

One of my favorite times of the Major League Baseball season is when teams must employ their minor league system because players get hurt or traded or, frankly, suck. Apparently, if you can’t find a winner floating in trade land, you’ll be forced to bring up that number one pick who’s been swimming in your minor league system for a couple of years. And when that happens, teams seem to concede – almost with shoulder-shrugged glee! – the season.

You’ll hear all the clichés: “He’s not quite ready, but we need a shot in the arm.” “We’re going to look to him for leadership.” “He’s ready to show what he’s got at the major league level.” “We need a new rookie to find the keys to the batter’s box.” All these used to reflect that the team is in dire straits.

When Branch Rickey built what is essentially today’s minor league system, he did it because he knew that’s where ballplayers come from. Now it’s a nuisance to have to actually develop a young player into a solid addition to the team rather than go out and just buy one. Major League Baseball teams, like a 16 year-old girl with her Friday allowance, don’t understand investing in the future. They want to spend money now for instant gratification. And if a team can’t get what they want, they piss and moan about it, write off the rest of the season and pray that a free agent will be around in the off-season.

Because I read the entire Sunday Star Tribune newspaper, I read Sidney “I’m The Reason The Twins Got A New Park” Hartman. And I find a reason, every single week, to pull my hair out of my head. I love to read what other people think. But I detest when opinions are baseless, ignorant, and written because the writer likes to see his or her name in print.

For the past several weeks, Hartman has stumped for Carl “Crybaby” Pohlad’s efforts to get a new ballpark for the Twins. He sided with Carl’s threat that if the Twins didn’t get a new park, Carl would take them elsewhere. Instead of good journalism and editorial, Sidney wrote exactly what readers needed to hate anyone opposed to a new ballpark, regardless of how much it will cost Mr. and Mrs. Non-Baseball-Loving Taxpayer. He spread the gospel of Carl and the Twins, generating the love, and he’ll get his free press box seat. If you ask some of his readers, they’ll claim Sidney is the reason the Twins got the park.

Now it seems Sidney is singing a different tune. In Sunday’s [June 11] paper he writes, “The best prospects should be given an opportunity to play because the Twins have no chance of overcoming the White Sox or Tigers this season. Give some of the better prospects at Class AAA Rochester the opportunity to develop here.”

Kinesaw help us all! Forget about winning the division. Forget about he wild card. Now that the Twins have finished their 60-game season, they must resort to employing lowlife minor leaguers, those spare parts that the Minnesota Yugos needs to finish out a wasted 2006 campaign. Sidney has given up on the team that he gets to watch for free for the rest of his life.

Any true fan will support their favorite team regardless of the outcome of every game. And a true fan never gives up on their team. That is the realism every fan accepts when choosing loyalty to a particular team. Sidney’s support changes every time the wind blows. Bandwagon fans call him an athletic supporter, but I prefer a more accurate description:

Jock strap.

He then writes, “What's hard to understand is that after 60 games a year ago, the Twins had a record of 36-24. The only real loss from last year's team is Jacque Jones, who is having a great year with the Cubs, but they added a three-time All-Star second baseman in Luis Castillo to plug a big hole, along with free agents Rondell White and Tony Batista. Still, the Twins were a poor 27-33 this season after the same number of games.”

Geez, I dunno, Sid. But I’ll take a stab at it:

Look that these player stats, through June 11, 2006:

PLAYER/AVG./OBP./SLG./2006 SALARY
Batista, Tony/.236/.303/.388/$1,250,000
Castillo, Luis /.282/.346/.357/$5,071,506
White, Rondell/.190 /.209/.224/$2,500,000

Now, let’s throw Nick Punto into this mix:

Punto, Nick/.310/.406/.391/$690,000

The Twins GM, Terry Ryan, went out and spent almost nine million dollars on an overrated infielder and two has-beens, while he had what appears to be a better player sitting on the bench the whole time. I’m supposed to believe that these players were the best the Twins could do with nine million bucks?

By the way, through June 11 of last year, Jacque Jones was hitting .290. This year he’s hitting at .297. Hardly carrying the team on his shoulders. It’s always easy to compare when the player is on another team.

Maybe that will help you understand, Sidney.

Actually, what is hard to understand is that since Carl got his new playground, he has not said one word about it. In Hartman’s April 22 column, he wrote, “In fact, you could see Pohlad spending some money to improve the team this year once a ballpark becomes a reality.”

I still can’t see that. And judging by Hartman’s recent rant, I will never see it.

posted by Windel  # 6:06 AM